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Tag Archives: BDSM

Will some BDSM trigger my lover’s combat memories?

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Q: I have recently reconnected with an old lover; we have been writing occasionally for years, but only recently saw each other after 30 years. He’s a combat veteran, has a Purple Heart, and was involved in some serious intrigue overseas. We’ve discussed restraints in the past, just kind of flirting with naughtiness, and I [...]

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How do I bring up spanking?

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Q: How do I communicate with my partner about spanking? I want to try it with him, but I don’t know how to bring up BDSM topics with sexual partners. A: There are several ways you can bring up the topic. For instance, it might be helpful to playfully bring up the subject during a [...]

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What is a silent alarm?

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Q: I’d like to know more about certain aspects of BDSM. What is a “silent alarm”? How do I know what I like and don’t like? How can I discuss it with a dominant man? Thanks. A: A “silent alarm” is a system you put in place to have a trusted friend or somebody else [...]

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How do I develop a non-sexual bondage relationship with a woman?

Monday, October 15, 2007

Q: I am aroused by bondage. I think that it all started when I was a little kid and I would play cops and robbers with my brother, if the cop was captured, he would be placed on a chair and tape gagged until we ‘escaped’. My siblings and I would always play kinky sort [...]

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Is it OK to kick my partner in the balls?

Monday, August 6, 2007

Q: My boyfriend likes ball-busting. He does not like any other BDSM. He likes me to kick his testicles very hard or sometimes punch them and likes them squeezed very hard and pulled on. This always causes an erection, even after one kick. I am fine with all this but was wondering about any short-term [...]

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